Happy New Year!

Good morning. How are those New Year's resolutions coming? Have you managed to work in more quality time for the family? Got your home organized? Stuck to that diet plan? Kept up with the exercise program? Made a dent in your debt to income ratio? Me? Well, I've fallen behind. Like, so far behind, I'm lost and will likely never be found again. Sometime in January my badly weathered person will muster enough breath to resolve never to resolve again before collapsing on the heap of unmet goals.

Let's evaluate the pile.

Resolution #1: Read through the Bible twice. Ha. I've been 3 days from the end of the first go round for about a month now. I keep readjusting the time frame (if you have a Bible app, I've hit 'catch me up' more times than I can count).

Resolution #2: Blog at least once a week. Hmmmm. That would mean I should have about 30 posts. That number at the bottom of this blog says 23 (well, after I post this one, it will say 24), and that is after I re-blogged two of my favorite recipes from a while back. I'm not sure those count.

Resolution #3: Write in my journal at least once a day. Hahahahaha! We're not even going to go there. Let's just say that voice you hear in your head when you're reading things, you know the one that goes along with what you're reading (well, at least there's a voice in my head when I read, maybe that explains more about me than I should be sharing, but anyway....), that voice went from super cool and totally awesome (obviously) to the most boring monotone Ben Stein-ish narration to my totally unexciting life. Well, that or a whiny Fran Drescher complaining about her totally unexciting life. I got tired of the voices in my head and the writer's cramp in my hand, and decided to concentrate on my blog. Ha. That went well.

Resolution #4: Yoga three times a week. Once again I'm lol-ing while I type. I will say however, we did get a treadmill (so I can't use the kids as an excuse not to run), and I learned about strength training at home. Right now, I'm running about 3 miles per session (when I'm not nursing an injury), and I did my first 5k race just a couple of weeks ago. However, I will NOT be posting the time. When I reach my goal of a 22 minute 5k, I'll post that time for sure.

Resolution #5: Finish my masters. I'm currently 2 classes away from finishing. The problem is, that's the same distance away from graduating I was when this year started.

Resolution #6: Potty train my 3 year old. Now, this one makes me laugh the most because in this process I've discovered that I must be the most incompetent potty trainer this world has ever seen. I mean, really! How hard is it to teach an intelligent capable child to stop messing in their pants? Apparently something a man with a doctorate and a woman with a (almost) graduate degree can't figure out. It's like this child has been trained in military level resistance and diversion tactics. I've nearly resolved (hahaha, there's that word again) to resign this process to her (not yet registered and school starts Wednesday) new preschool teacher and friends in class this year.

Resolution #7 and 8: These are private and no where near completion. If I accomplish them, you'll know, trust me.

Resolution #9: Play my piano every day. This is by far one of the most relaxing things for me. I can go from completely tense and good for nothing frustrated to calm and focused in just 15 minutes. Unfortunately, my keyboard (Korg Concert XC 2000, which I got for a birthday present when I was 17) isn't working. A couple of the keys stick or don't make a sound, and the pedals no longer work. Can't afford a new one, and the nearest place to have it fixed is about an hour away. I miss it. A LOT.

Resolution #10: Live more purposefully. I'm a planner at heart. I like things to go the way I've decided they should go, but I'm obviously still floundering around allowing life to dictate where I'm headed rather than me or my God. This just adds to my frustration and causes me to want to crawl in bed with a half gallon of rocky road ice cream and refuse to emerge until the lactose forces me out. Actually, this was the main reason I made resolutions this year. Because I wanted to set goals and see them accomplished, on purpose, not because the stars aligned and I just happened to be in the right place at the right time doing the right thing.

At the very bottom of my resolution entry in my journal, this is what I wrote:

"May the Lord direct your hearts to the love of God and to the steadfastness of Christ." 

2 Thes. 3:5

"My hope for this year is to be directed by God to His love and steadfastness. To finally learn to trust Him and to believe that He does love me. He is good, and He really does work all things for my good."

Where's that carton of rocky road?

Once again, I'm facing the beginning of another year, the school year. I'm going to have 3 kids in 3 different schools (well, that is if I can get my daughter registered and IF they still have an opening). One in a home school parent lead education program, one in public school and special education program, and one in preschool. If I ever needed to be organized and goal oriented, now is the time, but it just seems like the harder I work, the less I get done. We have hamsters (adorable, smelly little creatures that like to poop as soon as you pull them out of their cages), and they LOVE their wheels, especially at about 3-4am, but that's another topic. I often find myself feeling like I'm stuck on that darn wheel, running until I can't run anymore, eventually collapsing in the same place I started. There has to be a better way.

For what am I striving, exactly? Perfection? I think so, and I think my head and heart must have missed the memo telling all of us humans that perfection isn't possible in this life. I'm starting to think I might need to scrap all these resolutions and concentrate on that last line in my journal. "To finally trust Him and to believe that He does love me. He is good, and He really does work all things for my good."

So, here's to another school year! Maybe we should toast with juice boxes and throw confetti in the air. No, wait, I'll have to clean that up. Let's just stick to the juice. May I trust my God with my harried life, my children and my goals, and allow Him to make it all good.

Happy New Year!

Better Than Bojangles Biscuits

Light, fluffy and melt in your mouth good.

I originally posted this recipe a couple of years ago. It is in my opinion absolutely the best biscuit recipe there is, and good enough to please my biscuit snob husband. There are only a handful of things I can cook as good or better than his mama or grandmama, and this would be one of those things. My food allergic son has only had mine and his Nonna's biscuits, but my non-food allergic son will often remark while eating a biscuit from Cracker Barrel or Bojangles and tell me, "Mommy, yours are better." After which he can have pretty much anything he wants. He knows just how to butter up his mommy, tell her she's pretty and/or compliment her cooking. :-)

Anyway, these freeze well. When school starts I'll have a dozen or so of these little suckers frozen with chicken nuggets or sausage patties to use for quick homemade breakfast when I don't have time for homemade. I've also found they do just fine swapping out some of the flour for whole wheat pastry flour. I usually go half and half. Now, my husband noticed immediately that I had switched things around telling me not to mess with a Southern man's biscuit, but my kids eat them just as well as with the white flour. So, that's the way they will be getting their school breakfast biscuits. The thing you don't want to skimp on with biscuits like this would be the fat. That's what makes a southern melt in your mouth biscuit do just that.

I found the original recipe in Natalie Dupree's Southern Memories cookbook listed as the closest to the perfect biscuit recipe as she's ever found. I altered it to fit my son's food allergies and made it my own, but it is still pretty close to perfect.
To make it dairy free, you can use palm oil shortening in stead of butter and almond, soy or rice milk in stead of the buttermilk. You will just need to reduce the liquid and increase the fat you choose to keep the same consistency.

1 1/2 C Self-Rising Flour, natural and unbleached
1/8 tsp Baking Soda
1/2 tsp Salt
1 Tbsp Sugar
3 Tbsp Butter, plus 2 Tbsp melted for brushing
3/4 C Whole Buttermilk, maybe a little more depending on the consistency

Preheat your oven to 450 degrees F. Grease an iron skillet or 8-inch round cake pan. In a medium mixing bowl, combine flour, soda, salt and sugar. Work in the butter with your fingers or pastry cutter until there are no lumps larger than a small pea. (You can put this mixture in an air tight container and keep in the refrigerator for a week or two, then just add your buttermilk, shape and bake.) Stir in the buttermilk and let the dough stand for a couple minutes. The mixture will be wet.

Pour about a cup of flour onto a plate or cutting board. Flour your hands well and spoon biscuit sized lumps of wet dough onto the plate of flour (I use an ice cream scoop).

Coat lumps with flour and work back and forth with your hands to shake off excess flour. As you shape each biscuit, place onto the skillet or cake pan placing the biscuits together so they rise against each other. Too much room will make them spread out.

Melt about 2 Tbsp butter and brush the biscuits. Bake for 15-18 minutes at 450 degrees F, or until lightly browned.

Makes about 6 biscuits.

Homemade Nuggets

 

Chicken nuggets are a staple in most kids' diets. If you've got a food allergic kid, though, it can be tough to find any that are both safe and tasty. I gave up on that whole idea and figured out how to just do it myself. Now, even my non-allergic kids prefer my nuggets to Chick-Fil-A's. I've found that the key to good nuggets is buttermilk.

You can use boneless skinless chicken breasts, thighs or tenders. Cut them into about 1 inch chunks (I use scissors for that, makes it much more precise). Then place them in buttermilk to soak for at least 30 minutes (in the fridge). If you're cooking a pound of chicken and using a pretty good size bowl, you shouldn't need more than a cup or so of buttermilk. You can use soy milk to go dairy free, or even mix up a vinegar/salt brine to soak them in (just like your Holiday bird). You'll get the same effect just a little different flavor. While they're soaking, mix up your flour and seasoning.

For a pound of chicken, put about a cup of flour into a ziploc bag or bowl. Use self-rising flour (always natural and unbleached) for the 'extra crispy' crust, and all-purpose for the 'original' crust. You can go gluten-free and use rice flour, too (add a tsp of baking powder to the mix for more of an 'extra crispy' like crust). Add about a teaspoon of seasoning (recipe below), close the bag and shake well, or if you're using a bowl, whisk well to evenly distribute seasoning.

Start heating your oil to about 375 degrees F. You don't have to have a fryer to do this, and since I hate to reuse the oil when I fry meat, I usually fry these in my iron skillet anyway. You want to put enough oil to fill the pan about a half an inch or so deep. You can test the temp with a fry thermometer or wet your fingers and sprinkle some water in the pan. When it bubbles and sizzles you're ready.

Once your nuggets have soaked a little while, take them out of the buttermilk and put them dripping wet into the bag or bowl with the flour mixture. Shake them up or toss them well to get an even coating.

Once your oil is hot, drop the nuggets in one at a time, if you're frying in a skillet. You don't want to over crowd them. They'll make the temp drop in your oil a little, and if you put too many in at once, they'll stick together and end up greasy.

Let them cook for about 2-5 minutes on each side. Until you get used to frying, you'll need a meat thermometer to make sure they're done (about 165 degrees F). It is especially hard to tell when you go gluten free because the rice flour doesn't brown like wheat flour. Try this a few times, though, and you won't need the thermometer anymore.

Let them cool completely, but don't let them sit too long (they'll get soggy). Place them in a freezer bag and place in your freezer. When you're ready for a quick nugget meal, pull what you need out of the freezer and cook them in your oven. 400 degrees F for about 10-15 minutes or until heated through.

Seasoning

We like it spicy, and the more 'red' you put in the flour (especially if you're going gluten free), the more yummy your final product will look. You can add a little extra paprika and leave out the cayenne if you're worried about it being too spicy.

2 teaspoons paprika
2 teaspoons salt
2 teaspoons garlic powder
1 teaspoon black pepper
1 teaspoon onion powder
1 teaspoon cayenne pepper

Combine all the spices in a ziploc bag or tupperware container. Mix well. Store for up to 3 months or so.

Perspective is Everything

This morning was one of THOSE mornings. While I got up on time and got my shower before the kids got up (a rare treasure during the Summer), that was about the only thing that went right until we were in the car. Jackson didn't want to come down for breakfast. He didn't want to eat what I fixed. He didn't want to wear the clothes I picked out for him. My other children were exacerbating the problem, picking at Jackson and whining about him whining. Every transition was a struggle, and I found myself extremely frustrated. We finally make it to the car and are on our way to our play date. Yes. I was stressing about leaving late to play at a friend's house who would have been more than understanding of our tardiness, and for that matter, a friend that would have been totally fine with Jackson coming in his pajamas, bed head and flip flops. It was somehow too hard for me to just take it all in stride this particular morning. The tension filled my body, stiff and numb trying to clear my head so I don't end up complaining to the other mom the whole play date, I turned on the radio and began to listen to Addison Road's What Do I Know of Holy. Then we pass a funeral procession, and just like I do every time I see one of those, I prayed, "God, help them." Then I'm suddenly overcome and start balling like a baby.

There has been so much death in our friend and family circle lately. Some lost precious children, some fathers, mothers, brothers. Still others are facing deadly diseases threatening to take a loved one away at any moment. I couldn't help but compare my morning and all its frustration to the morning of those following that hearse. One of those mortal moments when the frailty of my own human condition and the fragility of the life in my care brought me to tears. The next few moments passed as my mind was flooded with the remembrance of so many blessings. The blessing of my son and all he is, autism included, stood out in those blessings. As hard as it has been adjusting to the special care he requires, this disease will not take him from me too early, and as hard as it is to handle the frustration that builds up from the life we live, I'm not following a hearse.

Perspective is everything.

Note: I shortened this after rereading it the next morning.

Happy Ever After and a Decade of Real Life

 How exactly do you stay married to someone you have nothing in common with? I wish I could say I have the answer, but "you just do" doesn't really cut it since life tends to be more complicated than that. I guess a better question might be, how did you get married in the first place?

My husband and I don't like the same kind of music, movies, tv, pass times, sports, passions, food, decorating style, fashion, books....I could keep going, really. He's a doctor. I'm an artist. He's concrete. I'm abstract. He went to public school. I was homeschooled. He went to a large secular university. I went to a small private college. He works to provide for our family. I work to keep us all from starving, stinking or streaking. He's a natural born leader. I'm more of a free spirit. About the only thing we have in common is our children and our faith.


I've often asked myself over the past ten years how exactly did this happen? How did two people so very different make it down the isle? And, how have we avoided the courtroom? Well, if I ever have that lightening bolt revelation, I'll let you know right before I write my own marriage self help book to add to the plethora of dusty books on my book case. I will say that the older I get, the more I realize how little I really do know about life and just how much I need help.

There was a time when my husband and I had more in common than it seems we do now. One of my favorite things about him was how we could talk for hours and I could ask him a million questions (usually about science or medicine), and he would just keep talking and answering as if he never got tired. He's a natural born leader like I mentioned above, but his gift is teaching. He can break down the most complicated concepts and explain them to anyone in a way they can understand. He won awards for patient communication in med school and residency, and it hasn't really changed. His patients LOVE him, and it's not all about how knowledgeable he is as a doctor (which I will say, he's pretty darn smart). It's about how much he cares about each and every one of them, even the difficult ones. His gift for teaching and communicating drew me in like a magnet, it makes him a better doctor and a better father, too. The best teaching moments, the ones I hope I remember all the way to my last breath, are the ones he shares with our children.

He works very hard to provide for our family. He always has, even when things weren't looking so good for us. That has allowed me the ability to devote myself completely to our children, especially  to Jackson's ever changing needs. He handles the bread winning so I can handle the bread making, and I am VERY thankful for that.

His type B personality is a pretty good compliment to my type A. His relaxed "it will all work out" temperment helps balance out my "the world is going to end right NOW" mentality. We might not have a whole lot in common, but maybe that's a good thing.

I believe my husband and I are together because God put us together, not to provide happiness but friction, the kind that smooths out rough edges and rusty patches. Iron sharpening iron (Prov. 27:17). I believe God is working in us and through us to give us MORE than happily ever after here on Earth, but abundant life with Him forever.

So, after 10 years, three kids, an autism diagnosis, and a whole lot of crazy life, I don't think it's so much about finding the right one, but about becoming the right one, together. Here's to another ten years of sharpening. Maybe by then we'll have it all figured out.

Marshmallow Protein Bars

I didn't like all the interesting ingredients in my favorite store bought protein bar. So, I decided I would try to make my own. The only thing is I didn't know how to bind it without adding the unpronounceable junk they do at the manufacturer. I was making Rice Krispie treats for my kids for the Fourth of July, so I decided I would use the other half of the marshmallow mixture and see what happened. The bars turned out REALLY good in flavor, but that's just too much sugar for it to be a 'healthy' snack or workout fuel. Also, they were kinda sticky (the way homemade marshmallow goes if you don't use confectioner's sugar or starch  to coat while they're setting). I've got another idea I'll post about later, but here's the recipe for these. If you're not counting calories or OFF sugar, these are really good! My husband and my oldest son kept nibbling while they were still warm. The best part of this recipe is the homemade marshmallow!

3 cups almonds, chopped
2 cups peanuts, chopped
3/4 cup sunflower kernels
3/4 cup pecans
1/2 cup Rice Krispies (added these as a filler, will probably use oats next time)
2 tbsp butter, melted
2 tsp honey

3 packages unflavored gelatin
1 cup ice cold water, divided
1 1/2 cups sugar
1 cup Lyle's Golden Syrup
1/4 teaspoon kosher salt
1 teaspoon vanilla extract

Place the gelatin into the bowl of a stand mixer along with 1/2 cup of the water. Have the whisk attachment standing by. In a small saucepan combine the remaining 1/2 cup water, granulated sugar, syrup and salt. Place over medium high heat, cover and allow to cook for 3 to 4 minutes. Uncover, clip a candy thermometer onto the side of the pan and continue to cook until the mixture reaches 240 degrees F, approximately 7 to 8 minutes. Once the mixture reaches this temperature, immediately remove from the heat. Turn the mixer on low speed and, while running, slowly pour the sugar syrup down the side of the bowl into the gelatin mixture. Once you have added all of the syrup, increase the speed to high. Continue to whip until the mixture becomes very thick and is lukewarm, approximately 12 to 15 minutes. Add the vanilla during the last minute of whipping.

While the mixture is whipping, spray a large bowl with cooking spray or coat with oil. Add the nuts and Krispies, then the butter and honey. After the marshmallows are done whipping, pour half the mixture into the bowl with the nuts. Mix well.

[You may want to add more or less of the nuts to get the combo and texture you like. You can use a completely different combo. You just want to have around 7 cups worth of whatever dry ingredients you use to make the right ratio of nut mixture to marshmallow ratio.]

Lay out on parchment paper or greased cutting board. Shape into large square or squares. Wait for it to cool and harden, about an hour or so. Cut into bars and enjoy. Makes about 24 bars.

You will have half the marshmallow recipe left. After pouring the marshmallow into the nut mixture, pour the other half into a greased or lined cookie sheet and sprinkle with confectioner's sugar or starch and let it set. Homemade marshmallows are the BEST! One of those things once you have the homemade version, you'll never want the processed styrofoam they sell at the store again.

Ok. Enough About Me, Let's Talk About Food

I started this blog to give me a place to share our autism story and provide a way for me to share our corn-free and/or egg-free recipes. I think it's gotten a little heavy on the 'story' and a little light on the recipes. It's not that I'm not cooking. I just haven't really had much time or energy for experimentation with new recipes. However, I've been working on a few things lately. Especially given my new found conviction for 'clean eating'. That's hard enough for a grown up who wants to change their lifestyle. It's a whole other challenge when you're talking about changing your children's eating habits, too. Not that their diet is crazy unhealthy right now. Just not what I would like it to be.

I decided to start things out with small measurable goals. That's the way you get where you want with a fitness program. I figure that's a good idea for new nutrition goals, too.

My first goal this year will be to find a vegetable I can get them to eat raw. Raw fruit, no problem. There's not much they'll turn down. Well, except for Jackson. He won't eat anything with seeds. Texture issues. Raw veggies, no way. Not even covered in ranch dressing. That's their dad's fault. He won't eat anything like that. No ranch or sour cream. I can get them to eat most steamed veggies when I make it a requirement for getting a treat after their meal. Hey, you gotta do what you gotta do. However, I want them to enjoy the benefits of raw veggies, too. We started with cucumber salad, one of my favorite summer veggie treats. I cut the onions really big so they could pick them out. Can't expect a kid to eat straight raw onions, right?

Cucumber Salad

1 Cucumber
1 Tomato
1/2 Onion
1 tsp fresh chopped Cilantro
1-2 tsp Olive Oil
Sea Salt or Kosher Salt to taste
Pepper to taste

Peel and slice cucumbers. Slice or cube tomatoes. Chop onion and cilantro. Combine veggies and cilantro in a bowl. Drizzle EVOO over the top. Salt and pepper to taste. Makes enough for about 4 good servings.

Well, I guess I should have said, you can't expect a kid to eat straight raw cucumbers or tomatoes either. I swear I could eat most of it all by myself, but they didn't like it. Oh, well. On to the next experiment. I've crumbled feta cheese over the top before. My sister-in-law uses my recipe but adds carrots. I think I'll keep trying this with other raw veggies until I find a combo they all like. Farmer's market here I come!